Next week is my birthday. I’m turning the big 31! Last year I softened the blow, I began referring to it as the release of Jess 3.0. However, this year I am doing better. It doesn’t seem like such a big deal this time. But I do have some thoughts…
- I look around and see where I currently stand. My life isn’t “bad”. I have three beautiful children. I have a roof over everyone’s head. There is food on our table. The bills are paid. I’m making it. But I do wish I had more to show for it. I wish I had a better paying job. Even an office job. One where I don’t have to work weekends. I wish I was buying a house instead of renting a house. I wish I was more financially stable. I wish that I was in a successful marriage. I guess I just wish that at 31, I was better off by now.
- With a 14 year old… in many ways I am glad that I can finally say I am 31 when people ask. I don’t look it from the get go… but it is even harder to explain sometimes. Each year that I can add to myself makes it a little easier. I know that sounds strange.
- I wish I had already followed through with my initial degree I had chosen. I changed my mind because when I was married the second time I couldn’t have a day care. So, I changed to another degree, which I completed. However, I must say that I wish the degree was completed instead of doing it now. I wish I could just open my home day care.
- I’m at the point that I really have no excitement for my birthday. I enjoy my change to visit with my family at my dinner. But once my dinner is over… the whole thing is pretty much done. I don’t have kids old enough to go shopping for me. I don’t have a boyfriend/husband to do anything special. It’s just going to be me and my children, which will be nice until I have to go to work that night.
- I’m a little irritated that when I was signing up for work, I didn’t pay attention to the dates. I would really like to be at home instead of working. But I will put on my navy blue scrubs and go into work. From what I gather, I’ve got a great group of co-workers that night. So hopefully it will be great!
Next week… chapter 31 begins. Hopefully it will be a great one! Forward progress I hope!